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Written at home after the last 'normal' day of high school...it was originally split into two seperate parts because of the nature of the first site. By the time I realized that it wasn't necessary, with this new layout, it was already too much work to combine them so meh.
The Last Day Part 1
The final day of my high school life has come and gone. Looking at it all now, I can't believe that I'm finally here...I don't understand how I got through all those years in one piece. For five years, I've seen so many things and grown so much. I've held crushes, been the subject of one, been through good times as well as the bad. Good times with friends mixed with all the sorrows that they've brought.
I've changed so much...from the shy and completely introverted loner in grade 9 to who I am now. I haven't changed completely, make no mistake about that. While I can banter pretty well with my friends and friends of theirs in a comfortable situation, as soon as you dump me into a party or a large social gathering like the prom, I revert back to what I used to be.
I still can't believe that it's all over at last...from the moment I stepped into DMCI at the first day of grade 9, I was looking forward to this moment so much. The moment that I would finally be free of school forever. You see, back then, I didn't really know that there would be more schooling in the form of university afterwards. Naive huh? All fired up with the thought of finally getting out of school, I wanted it to end. Standing here, now, I wish with all my heart that it was not so. I wish that there was maybe yet another year of high school to go through and spend with my friends. I wish that I could go back to grade 9 and live my life the way I would have lived it knowing what I do today. With all the social skills that I have now that I lacked before, who knows? Maybe things could have been different. Maybe I could have worked up the nerve to tell Elina how I felt back in grade 9. Or maybe I could have gotten around around to telling Lydia that I was fiercely attracted to her flaring intelligence and personality. Things could have been different...but even failing all of the above, if I had the choice, I would go back and relive the last five years. Even if I wouldn't be able to change anything at all, I would go back...relive all of the memories, the good as well as the bad for memories are what shaped me and made me what I am.
If there is anything after death, I guess that as of right now, the only thing that I would ask for is a second chance. A second chance at life to do all the things that I wanted or wished that I could do but never did. All the dreams and hopes that I had, of possessing skills that would make people look up and notice, unless I acted upon it, that's all they were. Dreams. Why didn't I try? Why didn't I try to learn how to play an instrument? Or learn how to draw or sing? Why didn't I stick with the Tae Kwon Do lessons from long ago? The soccer? The baseball? What made me stop? I don't know why anymore...answers are lost deep in the mists of time...but I digress...
No matter how many times I may be able to relive this day, here at the edge of forever, I don't think that I would change it for anything. I can't remember the last time I found something so amusing as the antics of Juliette and a few of her friends today at lunchtime. I was watching the whole time from where I sat at the other end of the cafe. The running and screaming as Mark and a few others kept trying to hit you with those water soaked balls. I saw your valiant efforts as you struggled to wrest the balls away from people who LOOKED to be at least twice your size. I was laughing inside as I saw you run around the cafe like a maniac, sometimes screaming, sometimes chasing. Later on, when I had joined Kimberly where she sat and talked to her, I remember you and Mark standing there, sizing up the damage that you'd done to each other. I'd have to say that from where I sat Juliette, it looked like you had the worst of the exchange. I can still clearly see you looking down at your wet shirt and saying in a plaintive voice, "I'm lactating!" As amusing as that was, more memorable was Mark's response as he gazed down at his own shirt and said, "ME TOO!!!"
The memories that all of us share is what binds us to each other. I think that I'm only beginning to truly understand that fact. Without memorable events holding two people together, they have nothing. It's the crazy stuff they do or say that sticks out in your memory like a sore thumb and that's what it will take to bring people together.
Continued...
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